What are the differences and similarities between male and female betrayal-traumatized partners?

Porn, Betrayal, Sex and the Experts — PBSE

In Episode 240, Mark and Steve address an important issue submitted by a male betrayed partner. Here's his submission—

How do male betrayed partners process betrayal trauma differently than women? What are the difficulties male partners have when trying to heal the relationship with their betrayer? Are there any differences in recovery and repair between male betrayed/female sex addict vs female betrayed/male sex addict? I have been attending 12 steps for codependents for sex addicts, and have only met one other man in my situation. Also, struggling to find any literature or resources on this topic.

Betrayal Trauma Defined: the emotional, financial and relational “bottom falling out”

• A traumatic paradigm shift from "what was" to "what is"
  • Healing takes on many components:
    • Reframing or repairing individual worth and value
    • Reframing or repairing attachment to the partner
    • Healing trauma and attachment issues
    • Rebuilding the capacity for trust in self and in others
    • Reframing and increased investment in self-care
    • Navigating shame issues
    • Handling triggers
• For both men and women, these are unavoidable facts and factors that must be addressed, regardless of sex.

Many of the differences between the healing tracks for men and women lies in the cultural differences present, which stem from:

• Family of Origin
• Gender Roles varying from culture to culture
• Religious/Spiritual Framework issues
• Existing, in-place support systems
• Societal norms for processing and expressing:
  • Grief
  • The need for help
  • Acceptance of support from others
  • Societal guidelines surrounding attachment

Learn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.com

Find out more about Steve Moore at: Ascension Counseling

Learn more about Mark Kastleman at: Reclaim Counseling Services