Episode 38: Language of Listening (3 Part Heart Model)

Entry Level Mom Podcast

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My guest today is the brilliant Betsy Blackard. We discuss The Language of Listening book by Sandra Blackard, her mother. Betsy grew up with incredible parenting, and her mission is to equip parents with the simple tools and perspectives needed to enjoy parenting and focus on connection. Betsy's mission is to help parents have a more enjoyable and connective relationship with their children.

Our conversation explores the concept of the Language of Listening, a parenting approach that integrates needs, relationship, and strength-based approaches into a simple three-part heart model.
The Heart Model consists of three components:
1) Say What You See, (keep it simple)
2) Name the Strength,
3) What Can We Do?
The approach emphasizes the importance of being present in the moment with your child, understanding their perspective, and responding to their needs that come from healthy drive. It also highlights the power of labeling and naming strengths to instill a positive sense of self in children.
The conversation includes personal anecdotes and examples to illustrate the effectiveness of the Language of Listening approach.
Betsy Blackard shares how she got started in working with children and her passion for using a needs-based approach. She discusses the challenges of working in childcare and the importance of prioritizing families and caregivers. Betsy talks about her mission to help parents understand and connect with their children, and how she launched online courses to make her approach accessible to parents worldwide. She also explains the concept of positive development psychology and the focus on studying what's going right in human behavior.
Betsy provides insights on resilience in children, the importance of unconditional love and belief in a child's potential, and the role of boundaries in parenting. In this final part of the conversation, Betsy Blackard discusses the importance of setting clear boundaries with children and enforcing them consistently. She emphasizes the need for parents to be clear on their own values and boundaries in order to confidently enforce them. Betsy also highlights the idea that all behavior is a form of communication and that children will continue to communicate until they feel heard. She suggests that parents should try to understand the underlying needs behind their children's behavior and work towards finding solutions that meet those needs. Additionally, Betsy shares insights on sibling conflicts and the power of mediation in resolving them.
Languageoflistening.com

Takeaways
The Language of Listening is a parenting approach that integrates needs-based, relationship-based, and strength-based approaches into a simple three-part heart model.

• The three components of the Language of Listening model are Say What You See, Name the Strength, and What Can We Do?
• Being present in the moment with your child and understanding their perspective is crucial for effective communication and connection.
• Labeling and naming strengths can instill a positive sense of self in children and help them develop problem-solving skills.

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