69. Dr. Tina Payne Bryson – Mothers, Attachment, Parenting and Mom Guilt

Red Ink Revival Leadership Podcast

Welcome to Episode #69 of the Red Ink Revival Leadership Podcast. Today’s conversation is with Dr. Tina Payne Bryson, a New York Times Best Selling Author and leading professional expert in child development and parenting. Our conversation takes us into the following topics:

Tina’s backstory of becoming a professional parenting expert

Attachment science and how attachment patterns develop our relationship templates for life

Science’s best predictor of how well our children will turn out

Defining the four attachment patterns that form how we connect in relationships

The “4 Ss” that build secure attachment (safe, seen soothed and secure)

Parenting unpredictability and its impact on a child’s brain

The power of consistent relationship repairs in creating a child’s window of tolerance

The importance of engaging our own story to know why kids can push our trigger buttons

What happens in a child’s emotional circuits when parents offer empathy and connection

What the answer is in parenting a child when you don’t know what to do

Fears that “I might be screwing my kids up.”

How our own parenting shame spiral will compel future “flip my lid” cycles

The most attuned parents will get parenting connections wrong about 70% of the time

It’s never too late to repair past relationship ruptures even though the child is now an adult

How to make sense of and manage parent guilt or mom guilt.

Half of who our kids become is because of genetics, and the other half is because of experience and epigenetics

Parents that ruminate around regrets do so because of roots in their own story and unprocessed anxieties

How to be at peace from regrets that we didn’t raise our kids in church

How the brain processes circuits for feeling stuck/regret versus circuits of empowerment

Do we need to forgive ourselves for parenting mistakes?

Using rituals and symbols to let go of the guilt and shame of parenting failures.

Our history is not our destiny.

How understanding our own parent’s backstories will compel compassion from us today

Managing the shame and what to do when we have feelings of “not liking” or even “being disgusted” with our kids.

A personal word to mothers for Mother’s Day love and encouragement

Dr. Tina Payne Bryson is the author of the Bottom Line for Baby and co-author (with Dan Siegel) of two New York Times Best Sellers—The Whole-Brain Child and No-Drama Discipline—each of which has been translated into over fifty languages, as well as The Yes Brain and The Power of Showing Up. She is the Founder and Executive Director of The Center for Connection, a multidisciplinary clinical practice in Southern California. Dr. Bryson keynotes conferences and conducts workshops for parents, educators, and clinicians all over the world, and she frequently consults with schools, businesses, and other organizations.  An LCSW, Tina is a graduate of Baylor University with a Ph.D. from USC. The most important part of her bio, she says, is that she’s a mom to her three boys. You can learn more about Dr. Bryson at TinaBryson.com.

A MESSAGE FROM TINA PAYNE BRYSON, PH.D.:

Thanks for joining us for our podcast conversation. I hope you gained new insights and applications for relating to the children you care about. If you're interested in learning more, or you'd like to receive my newsletter and social-media blasts, please click the links below.

You can also read articles, listen to podcasts, and watch video blogs about kids and parenting at my website, TinaBryson.com.

Warmly,

Tina

To subscribe to my newsletter, click here.

Follow me on social media: Facebook | Twitter | Instagram

Check out my 2021 online parenting group (replays of past sessions available).

Listen to my limited-series podcast with pediatrician Dr. Phil Boucher, Baby in the House

Watch a trailer for my workshop with Dr. Dan Siegel, MD, based on our latest book, The Power of Showing Up.

For a book and other recommendations, click here.

Learn more about my books:

• The Bottom Line for Baby - or click here to purchase on Amazon
• The Whole-Brain Child - or click here to purchase on Amazon
• No-Drama Discipline - or click here to purchase on Amazon
• The Yes Brain - or click here to purchase on Amazon

· The Power of Showing Up - or click here to purchase on Amazon

Visit our website: redinkrevival.com

Please rate, review, share, and subscribe!

Edited and produced by Evan (Emac) McAlister.