Episode 64 - If The Wagon’s A-Rockin’
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Welcome to another thrilling episode of The Great and Spacious Podcast, where opening lines are as elusive as Moroni’s plates. Abigail, our resident opener-flubber, dives into her specialty of comedic intros, proving once again that she’s much better at goodbyes. Moroni and aaaAAAaaa join in the banter, setting the stage for Abigail’s drink segment featuring the illustrious "Uncle Roy's Prairie Surprise," a gin concoction so wild it might just convert you back.
The hosts don’t stop there, spiraling into personal tales and tangents about time travel, historical mishaps, and last episode’s genealogical deep dive into Abigail’s ancestor. They dabble in the latest pop culture obsessions, dissecting the ethical dilemmas of "The Circle" and the dystopian delights of "Fallout." As the segment wraps, they tease the scripture deep dive up next—because nothing says entertainment like poking fun at divine revelations.
Scriptures: [00:13:14]
Moroni takes center stage, scrutinizing the Doctrine and Covenants (D&C) sections 15, 16, and 17, turning what some see as holy writ into a comedy sketch. First up is Section 15, where God supposedly tells John Whitmer to, surprise, preach repentance. Our hosts find this less than revelatory, mocking the banality of the divine directive.
Section 16’s déjà vu moment features Peter Whitmer, Jr., with almost identical content to Section 15. The hosts hilariously question the originality of Joseph Smith’s cut-and-paste revelations. And then there's Section 17, starring Joseph Smith, Oliver Cowdery, David Whitmer, and Martin Harris. The hosts have a field day with the “conditional” nature of witnessing the gold plates, suggesting it’s less a vision and more a strategic move to validate Joseph Smith’s prophetic claims.
With biting humor and a healthy dose of skepticism, they conclude that these scriptures are more about repetitive rhetoric than divine inspiration.
Church Teachings: [00:24:40]
aaaAAAaaa steps up to tackle the church teachings on the testimonies of the three witnesses to the Book of Mormon. Amidst a barrage of witty remarks, the host reads the official testimonies, pointing out the miraculous yet suspiciously vague nature of these spiritual experiences.
The discussion veers into the logistics and plausibility of these testimonies, suggesting that seeing the plates by "the power of God" is conveniently unverifiable. They humorously question the financial motivations behind the witnesses’ claims, hinting that divine revelation might come with a price tag.
Blending humor with critical analysis, this segment encourages listeners to look beyond the surface of these historical testimonies and consider the broader implications.
History: [00:48:15]
Abigail picks up the story of her ancestor, Warren Marshall Johnson, whose life reads like a tragic novel with a hint of dark comedy. Starting with the family’s diphtheria-induced decimation and eerie family photos, the hosts transition to 20th-century Mormonism and the end of polygamy—or not, as some members conveniently ignored the 1890 manifesto.
Johnson’s story continues with his move to Wyoming, a severe spinal injury, and the harsh realities of pioneer life. Despite building a log cabin and enduring brutal winters, Johnson’s injury worsened, leading to a gruesome death and an ironic reburial due
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