How Trauma Impacts Our Lives and Why We All Know About This First-Hand

Becoming Unapologetically Me with Helen Norbury

Becoming Unapologetically Me is the podcast for people who know that they have more inside them and want it to come out. In this episode, host Helen Norbury defines limiting beliefs and unpacks how they develop. She shares her own experience with them, and how she eventually stopped them from defining how she lived her life.

Despite all its complex functions, the brain only has two fundamental desires - safety, and the least amount of pain, which may not necessarily be no pain. “When you‘re growing up and you're a child, your brain sees your parents as that source of safety. If there's any sensation of lack of safety from within your parents, your brain can't deal with that because that's too scary an idea to get your head around,” Helen shares, “so the brain goes ‘No, it can't be them, it must be me’.” This is where you start to form these deep set beliefs about yourself.

These beliefs are further reinforced when we don’t give children the permission to “feel the feels” that aren’t positive - they don’t get to accept that as much as the human experience is positive, there are also times when things don’t feel that great, and that those times are perfectly normal. What’s important is letting yourself come out of the feels and not holding yourself in that space. Helen made this decision when she gave up alcohol, after realizing that her dependency on it was only anesthetizing the pain she felt as a result of the beliefs she had about herself.

She discovered that she had so much more to offer the world - even with all the trauma and emotions she previously suppressed. It wasn’t all smooth sailing, but she took all the broken parts of herself and made a mosaic bit by bit. Now, she uses the benefit of her experience to inspire others who feel trapped by their limiting beliefs. “We may not be responsible for the world that created our minds, but we can take responsibility for the mind with which we create our world.”

Key Takeaways

• Let yourself feel bad when you feel bad - suppressing your emotions will only harm you in the long run.
• Unpacking trauma doesn’t guarantee smooth sailing through life, but it shows you the truth - you are not as bad as you think you are.
• You have so much to offer to the world, warts and all.