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Persevering through Trauma, Loss, and Grief with Ann Shin
Manage episode 324833198 series 2980544
المحتوى المقدم من Yuliana Kim-Grant. يتم تحميل جميع محتويات البودكاست بما في ذلك الحلقات والرسومات وأوصاف البودكاست وتقديمها مباشرةً بواسطة Yuliana Kim-Grant أو شريك منصة البودكاست الخاص بهم. إذا كنت تعتقد أن شخصًا ما يستخدم عملك المحمي بحقوق الطبع والنشر دون إذنك، فيمكنك اتباع العملية الموضحة هنا https://ar.player.fm/legal.
Documentary filmmaker and author Ann Shin joins Yuliana on the podcast this week. Ann’s documentary My Enemy, My Brother was shortlisted for a 2016 Academy Award and nominated for an Emmy. Her previous documentary, The Defector: Escape from North Korea, won 7 awards including Best Documentary and Best Documentary Director at the 2014 Canadian Screen Academy Awards, a SXSW Interactive Award, and a Canadian Digi Award. In addition to these accomplishments, her book The Family China won the Anne Green Award and was shortlisted for the Gerald Lampert Poetry Prize. In today’s conversation, Ann shares the details of how her mother’s accident, coma, brain injury and eventual death have impacted her life.
She opens the episode up by talking about her mother’s accident that bound her to a 100 day coma and a subsequent brain surgery. She notes that she had to suffer the loss of her mother at the age of nine, despite the fact that she was still alive, and that she didn’t process the trauma until her ‘20s and ‘30s. As a workaholic with children of her own, she attributes her hardworking tendencies to a need for validation and financial security, especially after her mother lost her sense of self to the injury. Ann and Yuliana go on to talk about Ann’s experience ignoring her own emotional needs, how seeing her mother’s world shrink to the confines of her home was rather traumatic for her, and how she’s now gotten to the point that she longs to live her life for her mother and grandmother. The pair close out the episode by talking about Ann’s debut novel, The Last Exiles, as well as her mother’s death in her late ‘70s.
Episode Highlights:
- Ann’s mother’s coma and subsequent brain surgery
- Mourning the loss of her mother
- Processing the trauma later in her 20s and 30s
- Ann’s experience as a workaholic
- The desire for validation and security
- How Ann’s mother’s world shrunk exponentially
- Ignoring her own emotional needs
- Living for her mother and grandmother
- Her novel, The Last Exiles
- Her mother’s death in her late ‘70s
Quotes:
“By the time that she did actually wake up from a coma, we'd gotten used to the notion that our mother had changed. And so it was a really strange experience.”
“We had a very comfortable life, up until when my mother had her accident, they had their business. My father was also a real estate broker, my mother was working as a nurse. We took vacations, and we had a nice home and all that. But then after her accident, everything went downhill, we didn't have the money that we had once had. So as an adult, in my 20s, and into my early 30s, I was always kind of concerned, like, I'd end up on the street.”
“The parameters of her life closed into, basically, the four walls of the house that she lived in.”
“With my mother, it's complicated because her brain injury so affected her mind and her intellectual capacity, and I think what happened for me internally was I couldn't even acknowledge my own needs as a kid. I didn't feel like, you know, it was anything I wanted to bring up with my mother, so then I couldn't even acknowledge it within myself.”
“A lot of what I did in my early 20s, was like, forge an identity for myself in this culture. I'm working, having relationships, and having sex. It was like in the parlance of my peers, which is this North American lifestyle, and it was not something I could share with the rest of my family.”
“I feel like a lot of us women, we’re standing on the shoulders of other giant women that went before us, and that we feel and benefit from their legacy. So I feel that not only was I wanting to live in some way for my mother, but also for my grandmother on my mother's side.”
“In terms of my career, it's so interesting. I, you know, I work mainly with women. The company that I founded is a film company, and it’s women led. It's mainly women and I enjoy working with women of all ages. We've got everyone from the age of like, 20 to 53. It's great working together with other women, I think that's something that I'll always want to do.”
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