Episode 52 : When Fear Appears

Her Career Ladder

What is going on everybody? This is Michele Heyward, your woman of color and stem tech founder and gold digger. Yes, I'm a gold digger, G O A L digger. I welcome welcome everybody as usual on the Sunday nights. Hey Natasha, we are talking about your goals, reaching your goals going after your goals, not giving up on your goals. Tonight. Tonight, I want to talk about fear. Do y'all know what is the number one killer of goals? Do y'all know what it is? How many of you think is money? How many of you think money is the number one killer of goals? How have dreams of goals of dreams of reaching where you want to be? How many you think is money? The second option? It's your connections? And how about your third option? You just don't know what to do. Right? Which of those three do you think is the number one killer of dreams? You think it is money, connections and lack of know how? I'm going to tell you a secret. None of those are the number one killer of dreams. The number one killer of your dreams of your goals is your fear.
Fear kills more dreams, more hopes, more aspirations than money, lack of know how and having a right connection that it kills more dreams? Yes. Because when you fear something, many of us just give up, walk away, give reasons why it cannot be done. So what I want to do tonight, is talk about when fear shows up, because fear is going to show up. It's going to show up in different ways. And you're going to have to sit there and decide to do one of these three things. One or three. Right? You want to sit in fear, which means you ain't gonna do shit. You're gonna give up. You're gonna let it kill your dream. You're gonna walk in fear. And you're going to try to figure out how do I get this done. And the third thing is like, you know what, I want it I gotta have it. Uh, you want to run like hell in fear to get what you want. Those are the three things, three options you will see when it comes to fear when it as it relates to your dreams, your hopes, your aspirations, your goals, right? But let me tell you what fear is gonna show up as number one, no one I know, has done it before. You know how easy it is to drive a car because well, you see your family and friends driving a car. You know how easy it is to have your own place because other people around you have having your place. A lot of times we say it can't be done because we've never seen anyone or know of anyone personally who has done it. So we say oh, that's something that white people do. That is something that rich people do. That is something that people who go to college you give a reason why you can't do it because you're not like the people who have done it. Don't let that stop you. Don't let that kill your dream. Okay, number two, what when fear shows up? I don't have the money for it. Guess why?
Figure out how to get the money. Is it working a second job a third job? Is that selling your house is like getting a smaller apartment? Is it keeping your same apartment getting to one or two roommates? Is it selling your car? What is it that you want to have to do to get the capital you need to go after your dream? Right where you want to get that money. Figure that out that don't let that fear of I don't have money. Kill your dreams. The third one is the most common one. And if you're watching me right now, I'm gonna tell you something nobody else on here is gonna tell you. If this is your reason as to why you can't go after your dreams. You say I don't have time. Get off Periscope. Stay off social media. Stop looking at TV. Only Come on, use the internet to find the information and to find a community to engage with to help you grow. If you take that time doing frivolous stuff, right? Talking on the phone. Watching Periscope Oops, but this one might add value for you. So you may want to be here, right, you have to be very selective on how you spend your time. And you need to make those decisions. So cut out, looking at how to get away with murder. Lords, I do miss it, I do miss and I do catch up on it. But I'll binge watch two or five episodes at one time and be done. And not watch it for I don't know the rest of the season and catch, you know, a month or two later catch some more episodes. But what I found is when I gave up a lot of time on social media, and I completely gave up TV to like, 10% of what I used to watch, y'all, I had so much more time to engage with people to find that supportive community to help me go after my goals. So yes, it can be done, but you have to be committed to it. Okay. The last one I just mentioned is I have no support data, my friends are interested in what I'm trying to do. I don't know where to find people, guess what, Google it. Find Facebook groups, find, look for hashtags on Twitter, Instagram, on Periscope, even on LinkedIn has hashtags to find those communities, and LinkedIn has groups. So you really, really have to spend the time to find that support. So you not knowing anybody, you're not having money, you're not having time, you're not having a support system, are strictly fear, telling you to give up on your goal, telling you to give up on your dream. Don't let it do that. Don't let it tell you, these things are the reason why you can't be successful. These things are the reasons why you can't reach your goal. In actuality, they are not. That is just fear hiding itself is dressing itself up. This is what you're gonna do. You're gonna show up one day, like this is gonna show up one day like this. Yeah, and if you're gonna come back the next day, talking about dress like this, right? If you're gonna show up again, like this fear is gonna keep showing up. It is up to you to come up with a way to deal with it.
Sometimes that's phone referrals. Sometimes that's finding a friend. Sometimes like, you know what, I just got to do it. I'm just going to commit to it, make that call, shoot that email, make that video, write that email, whatever it is, just commit to taking that action and doing what you need to do to get through that fear. All right, if you want to start working on your goals for 2018, because 2018 is not over. So don't say, Michelle, I'm gonna start I'm like, No, I want you to go think about what did you want to do? Achieve in 2018? Get the gold diggers, this free gold diggers guy, fill it out one or two of your goals? Probably one that you can really start on and focus on between now the last week of November and all of December and really figure out that plan. What does it look like is that the guy that gives you a smart format, and then you can work on your 2019? Start writing those out, but focus on something else in 2018? Because don't keep saying one day I'm going to do it. Make it today day one guess like Michelle what? Don't wait for one day. You keep saying one day I'm gonna do that. No make today. Day one, make this the first day that you start working on that goal. Time is not guaranteed. Take it health is not guaranteed. Take this time take this opportunity. Grab the guy, write it out. In there. I add something I use the smart goal format, but I add one thing which is accountability. And you truly truly have to have accountability to help you get through your goals that accountability partner or partners help you stay accountable. help you stay focused, help you not give up to fear, no matter what it looks like. Alright everybody, I'm Michele Heyward. I will be back next Sunday in a new location, talking about your goals. Everybody, have a great week, and I will talk to you later. Bye