Healing Through Love: How I Became the Mother I Never Knew

Confessions

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In this deeply moving episode of Confessions: HIV+ Women, Lori shares her powerful journey of overcoming trauma, addiction, and HIV, ultimately finding healing and becoming the mother she always dreamed of. Born in Wichita, Kansas, Lori is a 43-year-old professional with a master's degree in counseling psychology and 18 years of experience as a therapist. But behind her academic success, Lori’s life story is one of survival and resilience.

Growing up in a tumultuous home with an alcoholic, verbally abusive father, Lori’s parents divorced when she was just six. Her family moved to California, where Lori suffered years of sexual abuse by her stepfather, a secret she kept for many years. Despite these early hardships, Lori later built a career and became a mother. But six months after giving birth to her twins, Lori received an unexpected diagnosis—HIV. This news came after she had visited the doctor following a warning about Hepatitis C, but the diagnosis revealed something more life-changing.

She was diagnosed with HIV six months after giving birth to the twins. As a mother, Lori was overwhelmed with concern about possibly passing HIV to her newborns, especially since she hadn’t been tested during pregnancy since she was not considered to be “high-risk”. Shortly after she gave birth to her twins, Lori struggled with post-partum depression and relapsed. Lori and her partner at the time began using meth again. This led to her therapist filing a mandated report and removing her children from her. Her twins tested positive for HIV while in foster care.

Lori worked hard to achieve sobriety and get her children back. Today, Lori is a mother to a 10-year-old son and two 4-year-old twins, a boy and a girl and her children are thriving. Her oldest son is in 5th grade and loves basketball, while her twins are excelling in kindergarten. Lori is a single mother determined to be the mother she never had, navigating life with love, dedication, and a commitment to spending quality time with her children.

Lori’s story is not just one of struggle but of strength. From childhood trauma to substance abuse, recovery, and the challenges of the COVID-19 pandemic, Lori has faced it all. With the support of her brother, who played a key role in her recovery, Lori found the strength to rebuild her life.

Today, Lori is open about her HIV status with family and friends, helping to break the stigma and promote the importance of medication adherence and U=U (undetectable = untransmissible). As a therapist, she uses her own experiences to empower others, emphasizing the importance of self-care, healthy choices, and resilience.

Lori’s story serves as a powerful reminder that success in education or career doesn’t shield us from life’s toughest challenges. But with a willingness to change, dedication, and the support of others, we can overcome even the greatest obstacles. Join us for an inspiring conversation about healing, love, and the strength to transform our lives.

Funding provided by the Health Resources & Services Administration (HRSA) Ending the HIV Epidemic Grant and the County of Los Angeles, Department of Public Health, Division of HIV and STD Programs

This podcast is brought to you by the Los Angeles Family AIDS Network