84: Self-Advocacy When Being Gaslighted

Birth Matters

When Becky and her transgender husband decide to grow their family, it’s a long, winding road to meeting their baby. First step: make very careful adjustments to her depression & anxiety meds in order to conceive as safely as possible. Next step: the tedious process of seeking out a sperm donor. Then they had to go through 7 emotional rounds of IUI and finally IVF before they could even start a viable pregnancy. Today Becky shares all of those details plus her baby’s birth story, which starts with contractions in the middle of the night, being told she’s not actually in labor when she clearly was, augmenting with pitocin, Becky advocating to have her preferences be honored, and an otherwise fairly uncomplicated birth. She also shares a bit about her breastfeeding journey and how postpartum anxiety started around 3 months out from birth when baby went on a nursing strike.

Please always curate for yourself which episodes you feel will build your confidence and not your anxiety. This is one of the more challenging stories in that Becky was the unfortunate recipient of patient gaslighting, which could be upsetting or triggering for some listeners. However, you’ll hear how smartly Becky advocates for her voice to be heard and her preferences to be respected, so this is one reason we feel this story could be very useful for expectant parents to hear.

If you do choose to skip the story, I highly recommend tuning in to the teaching portion at the end because I’ll go over some simple but powerful self-advocacy strategies that are a glimpse of what you’ll also learn if you come to birth class.
Show notes at birthmattersshow.com

• Subscribe for email updates
• Show notes (transcript, resources, photos)
• Connect: Instagram | Facebook | Twitter | [e-mail]