17: How should women choose between their family and career?

BE TRUE BE HAPPY BE YOURSELF WITH YUKI MIYAKI

Transcript for Ep17:

Welcome to Be True, Be Happy, Be Yourself show, I'm Yuki Miyaki. In this episode, I will be sharing with you my personal story.

Does choosing career means sacrificing your family? Or is it the other way round? I believe this is a problem for many professional women. Can you achieve a balance between career and family? Whenever you encounter multiple-choice questions like this, it is like "If your mom and your other half fall into the water. Who will you save? Today, I want to share with you how I balanced both sides through my recent experience. I hope I can give a new inspiration to women entrepreneurs, especially those with children.

In July 2020, I had to make decisions to choose between work and my family. As my second daughter Miyumi, had been feverish for a week. When my husband and I were about to attend a very important business gathering, Miyumi started to have a high fever that day. Since it was impossible to cancel the pre-booked meeting, my eldest daughter Miyaki was later responsible for taking her sister into the hospital for examination. My husband and I went to the appointment with a heavy heart to complete our business. After an examination, Miyaki told us that Miyumi must stay in the hospital for observation to determine if she has dengue. When I was talking on the phone with Miyaki, I was really emotional. I was stuck because of work, and my child is still in the hospital without knowing the status of the test.

These words started to pop into my mind: "Why am I a useless and irresponsible mother?" Self condemnation and guilt filled my mind.

After my husband and I finished our work, we rushed to the hospital to visit our daughter. When we reached, our girls were looking at us and gave us sweet smiles. They have taken care of everything handled by themselves. They even cared about how our meeting went if it was smooth. Finally, as an older sister,Miyaki asked to stay with her younger sister, and insisted us to go home and rest after a busy day. Their maturity and sensibility made me very pleased and moved.

I believe that many women, especially those who are outstanding in their careers, tend to be blamed when family issues occur and you can’t handle it due to your work. This incident,reminded me of a sentence that a friend once shared with me. This friend often goes abroad to help children from poor families. Once she was fortunate enough to ask the Dalai Lama: "If I am taking care of other people's children, who will take care of my children?" Then Dalai Lama replied: "If you help others take care of their children, then God will definitely send someone to take care of your children." I told myself, I believe that God has given me so much talent to help more people, more families, and make my life unique. Therefore, I believe that God will send angels to take care of my children.

In this matter, what I learned deeply is that when things happen, the result will become depends entirely on our thoughts. When all we see are demons, we live in hell; but if all we choose to see are angels, we live in heaven. We can learn how to transform from entanglement, guilt and self-blame mentality into gratitude and powerful blessings.

Secondly, when something happens, there must be a reason for it, and we must learn to accept it. It may not necessarily be a bad thing, but depends on how we label it.

Thirdly, learn how to see perfections from imperfections. In fact, business women and corporate women are just an identity. It is just a title, without any particularity. As long as you are the same as other women, you have a sense of peace, learn to find balance, and don't have to pretend to be anything. Learning to accept ourselves is also a beginning. When facing imperfections, we don't need to blame ourselves, see imperfections, and learn from our mistakes. This will allow us to grow into better leaders, mothers and wives.

Children always learn from how their parents treat others. I always believe that my children are so sensible and mature. I believe that they understand we do our best in careers to bring happiness and prosperity to our family. When faced with an incident, we don’t have to be victims. Since we have chosen to be a entrepreneur, we can arrange our time and achieve a balance between career and family. Even if the process cannot be perfect, we can learn from it and improve ourselves.

I hope that by sharing my story, will inspire you to have the courage to change and create an abundant life.

Connect with me on Facebook, Instagram and LinkedIn and the links will be in the show notes.

I look forward to seeing you in my next episode where I will be sharing with you more stories about my life and how you can Be True, Be Happy and Be Yourself!

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