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DNA Surprises

Alexis Hourselt

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Welcome to DNA Surprises, a podcast that delves into the world of unexpected DNA discoveries. I'm your host, Alexis Hourselt. In July 2021, my life took a surprising turn when I found out l'm an NPE-a person who's experienced a non-paternal event. In other words, my biological father isn't who I thought he was. Join me as we explore the stories of NPEs, adoptees, and donor-conceived people and their families. Get ready to unravel the astonishing journeys that begin with a simple DNA test —th ...
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Welcome to Family Twist, the podcast that dives deep into the tangled webs of family secrets and DNA surprises. Each episode, hosts Corey and Kendall Austin Stulce explore the complex and challenging truths that come with discovering you are a non-parent expected (NPE) individual—someone whose familial origins aren't what they seemed. Through candid interviews with people from the NPE, adoptee, and donor-conceived communities, Family Twist offers a platform for stories of unexpected parentag ...
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show series
 
Intergenerational trauma. It’s something we talk about a lot here. The most common cycles we discuss are the patterns of keeping secrets and the patterns of shame. In this week’s episode, you will hear a story about a cycle of NPEs. When Bobbi became pregnant with her third child, she knew that was not in a position to care for another baby. She re…
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Welcome to a special Thanksgiving episode of Family Twist! As the holiday season kicks off, Corey and Kendall take a brief pause to share heartfelt moments of gratitude and reflect on Thanksgiving traditions from their childhoods to today. From Kendall’s memories of his father’s long holiday weekends and lively house-hopping parties in Missouri to …
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Who would I have become if I had known the truth? How were the interactions I had throughout my life colored by an unknown truth? These are questions so many of us ask ourselves, over and over and over again. The reality is, we will never know, no more than we would know who we would have become if we’d been born in another country. Part of the DNA…
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For Shirley, life was a mystery with pieces that never quite fit—until a DNA test in 2001 revealed the unthinkable truth: she had been switched at birth. Raised in one family and belonging by blood to another, Shirley’s world was upended. In her memoir, The Little Dark One: A True Story of Switched at Birth, she recounts the trials and triumphs tha…
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If you’ve had a DNA surprise, you might listen to this podcast from the perspective of someone who just uncovered their results. Or did it happen years ago, when consumer DNA testing became popular? What has changed for you since the day you opened your test results? In this week’s episode, I’m joined by a guest from Season 1, Crystal. Crystal had …
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In part two of this eye-opening conversation, Kendall Stulce and Rich Uhrlaub pick up where they left off, diving even deeper into the emotional highs and lows of the adoption journey. This episode unveils the unfiltered realities adoptees face, from unexpected family rejections to the healing power of creative expression. Rich continues sharing in…
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When people uncover DNA surprises, they are often left to unpack the mysteries themselves. From the who, what, when and where around their births to where their newly identified family members are today, we spend hours searching newspapers, online archives, and obituaries. Many times, we find what we’re looking for. Sometimes, we don’t. In this wee…
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In this gripping episode, Kendall Stulce opens up a powerful, no-holds-barred conversation with writer, advocate, and adoptee Rich Uhrlaub, the creative mind behind For the Records—a bold new musical that brings the haunting truths of adoption to the stage. Set in 1967, Rich’s musical unravels the hidden heartache of the baby scoop era, a time when…
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Did you know that the DNA Surprises podcast community meets in a virtual support group every month? We started the Third Thursday Meetup in 2023 to serve as an additional resource for NPEs, late-discovery donor-conceived people, and late-discovery adoptees to find community and support. Third Thursdays have quickly become one of my favorite nights …
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In this special Halloween crossover episode, Corey and Kendall invite listeners into the unique space where family stories and horror healing meet. As the founders of both Family Twist and Horror Heals, Corey and Kendall explore the ways that family traditions, especially around Halloween, can bring people closer together—even in the most unexpecte…
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Not every DNA surprise has a happy ending. And sometimes, what seems like a happy ending takes a turn. But the opposite is also true. In this week’s episode, Shannon shares how she learned the truth about her paternity and had to wait several years before she could identify her biological father. When she finally found him, he was receptive, before…
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In this special crossover bonus episode, we share an insightful conversation from our sister podcast, Horror Heals, where we explore how horror can be a powerful tool for healing trauma. Corey and Kendall dive into Kendall’s adoption journey and DNA found family story, connecting it to the themes of resilience and recovery that often arise in both …
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Many people in the DNA surprise community grew up with dads, or birth certificate fathers, BCFs as they’re often called. We are raised by these men and then one day, through a DNA test or other means, we learn that they are not our biological fathers. But what if you never really felt like you had a dad? How does a DNA surprise affect you? In this …
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In Part 2 of our heartfelt conversation with Cree filmmaker, Kristal Parke, we explore her journey of reconnecting with her Opaskwayak Cree Nation roots and her Sicilian heritage. From embracing her Indigenous identity to the emotional weight of her birth family reunion, Kristal reflects on how her documentary, Because She’s Adopted, has helped her…
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DNA Surprises bring up a range of emotions, and if there’s one thing I hope I’ve made clear on this show, all those emotions are valid. In this week’s episode, Joan shares why her DNA surprise was more of an interesting adventure than a dramatic event. Her story is one of optimism, curiosity, and patience - it took her a decade to solve her mystery…
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In this powerful episode of Family Twist, Corey and Kendall Stulce sit down with Cree filmmaker and adoptee, Kristal Parke, to discuss her impactful documentary Because She’s Adopted. Kristal’s film dives deep into the complex emotional landscape of adoption, exploring themes like the primal wound, hidden trauma, and how adoptees often navigate ide…
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Welcome to the 100th episode of DNA surprises! OK, technically I’ve had more than 100 episodes already, but this is the 100th DNA Surprise story I’ve had the privilege of sharing with you all. So, in celebration of 100 episodes, I thought we’d take it allll the way back to the beginning. In this week’s episode, I’m joined once again by Yvette, my v…
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In this episode of Family Twist, Corey and Kendall Austin Stulce reflect on their Halloween experiences growing up, contrasting their childhood traditions and the cultural perceptions of Halloween. They delve into the significance of community and identity, particularly in relation to donor conception and adoption. The conversation also explores th…
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It’s your story. You have the right to tell it. This is something we hear a lot in the DNA surprise community - I say it a lot myself. In this week’s episode, Ruby shares a unique perspective on this philosophy. Ruby took her DNA test expecting to learn more about her Mexican heritage, and instead uncovers a half-sibling and learns her biological f…
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What would you do if you found out that your biological father wasn’t the man who raised you, but someone you’d known in the periphery of much of your life? Someone who’d photographed weddings, even done your taxes? In this episode, Beth shares her journey after discovering her biological father was a long-time colleague of her mother. Beth talks a…
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In this episode of Family Twist, Corey and Kendall Stulce sit down with David to explore the profound and raw themes of relinquishment, addiction, and healing. The conversation starts with an intriguing discussion about the Blue Mind movement, the scientifically backed benefits of water for mental health. David shares how being near water has becom…
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Hello, friends! Kendall and Corey launch their new podcast, Horror Heals, today, and we wanted to share one of the first episodes with you. If you like, please share, subscribe and review. Have friends or family who might like horror? Please share! And subscribe and leave a review so we can reach more people who need to know that Horror Heals! http…
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What never fails to surprise me is how innocently DNA surprises begin. In this episode, we hear from Doe - yes, that’s a pseudonym - who uncovered her DNA surprise in 2021. A skillful genealogist, Doe bought a DNA test for her husband, who was curious about his family history. As it just so happened, she purchased the test during a buy one, get one…
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In this compelling episode of the Family Twist podcast, Corey and Kendall Stulce sit down with Lezlee, author of If You Only Knew: Navigating DNA Surprises and the NPE World. Lezlee shares her deeply personal story of uncovering a life-changing truth about her biological father through a decade-long journey of DNA testing and family revelations. Sh…
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In this compelling episode of the Family Twist podcast, Corey and Kendall Stulce sit down with Lezlee, author of If You Only Knew: Navigating DNA Surprises and the NPE World. Lezlee shares her deeply personal story of uncovering a life-changing truth about her biological father through a decade-long journey of DNA testing and family revelations. Sh…
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In this episode of the Family Twist podcast, Kendall takes the reins as he engages in a heartfelt conversation with fellow adoptee, Greg Gentry. The two discuss their adoption experiences, touching on the challenges of reunion with biological families, the emotional impact of discovering one’s adoption later in life, and the ongoing journey of heal…
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Welcome to the Season 8 finale of DNA Surprises. In this episode, I’m joined by Deanna, who shares her NPE story. Deanna has experienced unspeakable amounts of hardship in her life, from abandonment to abuse to her DNA discovery. Her story is difficult - and powerful. You’ll hear how she’s still reckoning with the what-might-have-beens and the whys…
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In part two of this conversation, Kendall Stulce and guest, Lori Evans Ermi, discuss their experiences with adoption and the importance of community and education. They share their personal stories of reunion and the challenges and joys that come with it. They also touch on the need for adoptees to be seen and recognized, and the importance of unde…
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In this episode of Family Twist, Lori shares her extraordinary journey of adoption, intertwined with her love for music and family dynamics. Lori recalls her experiences and mesmerizes with stories about her daughter, an adoptee and a gifted singer who deeply contributed to her book's unique concept of pairing adoption stories with songs. Lori also…
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Twists of Fate: Diana's Journey of Identity and Family Secrets In this episode, Diana shares her astonishing journey of discovering her true origins. Born in Montreal instead of Manhattan, through a black market network involving baby smugglers, doctors, and illegal maternity homes, Diana unravels her past over 29 years. Exploring themes of identit…
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Twists of Fate: Diana's Journey of Identity and Family Secrets In this episode, Diana shares her astonishing journey of discovering her true origins. Born in Montreal instead of Manhattan, through a black market network involving baby smugglers, doctors, and illegal maternity homes, Diana unravels her past over 29 years. Exploring themes of identit…
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Every DNA Surprise is unique—the who, what, when, and why surrounding an NPE vary from person to person. Still, after nearly 100 interviews, I’ve noticed consistent themes in these stories. One of those themes is a complicated mother-child relationship. When Jennifer took her DNA test, she had no idea that her family tree would change forever. As i…
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DNA Surprises are confusing. They’re confusing for the people they happen to as they try to make sense of newfound information. With so many characters, twists, and turns in each story, they’re also confusing for people listening to DNA Surprises stories. This week’s DNA surprise story is no exception. In fact, it features a triple-NPE. So before w…
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How does growing up as an Asian adoptee in a white family influence mental health and identity? This episode delves into Joey's personal story of being a Japanese adoptee raised by a white woman, exploring how his experiences with identity, trauma, and belonging led him down a path of drug use and self-harm. Joey and Beth share their candid journey…
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To paraphrase The Beatles, we get by with a little help from our friends. This is especially true when it comes to DNA Surprises. In this week’s episode, coworkers Robyn and Ida share their NPE discoveries, which happened right around the same time. In fact, Robyn used her genealogy skills to identify Ida’s father. They each reflect on their person…
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How does the journey of seeking one’s birth parents unfold in real life, with all its emotional complexities? For many, the decision to seek out biological roots is driven by a deep need for connection and identity. However, this journey can surface unexpected emotional challenges, from rejection to surprising familial revelations, as Kendall and o…
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DNA surprises rarely happen in a vacuum. So many of the people I speak to have experienced other traumas throughout their lives, long before sending off DNA tests. In this week’s episode, Courtney shares how her mother’s mental health struggles played a large part in her childhood. She knew she was adopted by her stepfather when she was young and g…
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In this conversation, Corey Stulce interviews Jordan Elizabeth Braxton about her transition journey and her experiences as an intersex woman. Jordan shares her realization of being female from a young age and her decision to transition later in life. She discusses the challenges she faced, including societal expectations and anti-LGBTQ laws. Jordan…
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In this bonus episode of DNA Surprises, I chat with Iliamari Vazquez Houston, a therapist based out of the Phoenix metro area. Iliamari will facilitate a session on generational trauma - and generational healing - at the DNA Surprise Retreat, September 19-22, 2024 in Phoenix, AZ. We discuss what generational trauma is and how we can begin to break …
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Sometimes, after DNA surprises are revealed, our relationships with our raised parents become strained. Sometimes, this leads to estrangement. But for others, these surprises simply compound already strained relationships. When Dawn had her DNA surprise, she was already virtually no contact with her mother. In this week’s episode, she shares why sh…
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Have you ever felt like you were hiding behind a mask, both personally and professionally? Comedian Lauren shares her DNA surprise and the realization that she has been hiding behind masks, both personally and professionally. She reflects on her journey of self-discovery and the impact it has had on her stand-up comedy. The conversation explores th…
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How can horror movies become a source of comfort and healing? Corey and Kendall Stulce announce the launch of their new podcast, Horror Heals, which focuses on the therapeutic aspects of horror culture. They discuss their love for horror movies and how they were introduced to them at a young age. The podcast will feature interviews with horror movi…
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In this bonus episode of DNA Surprises, I chat with Jenna Hedstrom, E-RYT 500 and Expert Breathwork Facilitator. Jenna will lead a breathwork session at the DNA Surprise Retreat, September 19-22, 2024 in Phoenix, AZ. During our conversation, we discuss what breathwork is and how it benefits us. We also chat about how to overcome blockers around pra…
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(CW: Suicide, abuse) A common question in our community is “when is the right time to tell the truth about parentage?” While some say there is never a good time to tell, many believe that the truth should be shared from birth. In this week’s episode, Miranda’s story highlights the importance of telling early - and often. Miranda’s mother never hid …
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Have you ever wondered about the emotional rollercoaster of discovering long-lost family through DNA testing? The Psychological Effects of Parental Lies In this episode, Debbie Smith Olson discusses her personal story of discovering her biological father and half-siblings. She shares her experience of being lied to by her biological mother and the …
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During this bonus episode of DNA Surprises, I interview advanced yoga teacher Lanita Ugstad. Lanita will facilitate a gentle movement session at the DNA Surprise Retreat, September 19-22, 2024 in Phoenix, AZ. We discuss how yoga is beneficial for people who have experienced trauma, and what it means to facilitate a session through a trauma lens. La…
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Did you grow up feeling different from your family? That feeling of being inexplicably out of place haunts many people in the DNA surprise community throughout childhood and adulthood - before they uncover the truth. In this week’s episode, Sarah shares how while she always felt different from her family - she was more sensitive and had a different…
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Have you ever wondered about the secrets and stories hidden within the world of adoption? Dr. Joyce Maguire Pavao shares her personal journey of being adopted and how it led her to become a therapist specializing in adoption and foster care. She discusses the secrecy surrounding adoption in the past and the importance of transparency and openness i…
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In this bonus episode of DNA Surprises, I speak with therapist Venessa De La Cruz about betrayal trauma. Venessa will facilitate a session on Betrayal Trauma at the DNA Surprise Retreat, September 19-22 in Phoenix, AZ. She defines what betrayal trauma is and how things like DNA surprises can manifest for us both physically and mentally. We also div…
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